From the day your children were born, somewhere in the back of your mind, you imagined your child's wedding day, including all the hopes and dreams that would go with it. You stressed over whether they would make the right choices in love -- and of course, they did. Now that the day is here, you find yourself in different kind of dilemma: What will you wear?!

Not to worry. Today, there is no dictate in fashion for mothers of the bride and groom. Choices run the gamut from minimal and sleek to all-out glamour. As with all fashion, wear what you love and what looks best.

Accentuate The Positive. Today's average bride is 26 and her mother is between 50 and 65. You don't feel old, so don't dress that way. Remember to flaunt your assets and hide your flaws. It's your day, too.

Bridal Colors. The bride may or may not request that you wear a certain color. Sometimes that's no problem. Sometimes it is. If you think you look ghastly in her color choice, gently ask if you might wear a different shade. Chances are, she'll agree. If the bride is your daughter -- well, she's your daughter; and if she's your daughter-in-law -- she'll want to please your son.

Current Trends. Once you have the color settled, it's time to shop. Mothers of the bride and groom have turned to Philip Mendelsohn, a high-fashion retailer in suburban Philadelphia, for 35 years. "For the first time, mother of the bride dressing is not serious and staid," he commented. "I'm seeing lots of jewel tones, lots of neutrals, lots of muted colors. Many women this age still have a nice figure. Why not show it off? This is a day to absolutely look your best. Not sexy, but stunning. Not youthful, but young."

Evening Weddings. For evening weddings, Mendelsohn sees a trend towards fabulous gowns, with matching shawls or sheer jackets that come off for the reception.

Afternoon Weddings. Smart sleeveless or short-sleeved sheaths with jackets or 3/4 coats look wonderful. Suits always provide a perfect solution. Nothing is more beautiful, more chic, than a smashing suit in a luscious hue and luxurious fabric. The season's omnipresent beading and embroidery often adds that special touch.

Designer Wear. Designer Pamela Dennis is best known for her glamorous evening gowns, such as those seen on Annette Bening, Liv Tyler and Joan Rivers. "Frumpy is a word of the past," commented Alison Trow, Dennis' public relations director. "We're seeing lots of subdued sparkle, lots of 3/4 sleeves, lots of ballskirts, lots of jackets that come off for receptions." A favorite is a fabulous silk dinner jacket with four crystal buttons, worn with a matching long trumpet skirt for evening, or a to-the-knee skirt for daytime.

Every designer offers an array of these looks. If your budget is not designer, go look anyway. Find a style you love, then shop for it at your price point.

Invest In The Best. For this special day, splurge as much as your pocketbook will allow. Every fashionable look is available in every price range. Shelli Segal, A.B.S. and Tahari, available at Bloomingdale's and other national chains, create some of the best designer copies around. In fact, many manufacturers offer sensational styling at reasonable prices.